Conversating means having a conversation, yet many teachers and style guides still favor conversing or talking in school and work writing.
You’ve seen it in a text, heard it at work, or caught it in a comment thread: “We were conversating.” It sounds close to conversing, so it slides by for readers. Then you pause and wonder if it’s right, or if it’s one of those words that gets side-eyed in a classroom.
This article gives you a clean definition, shows where people accept it, and helps you pick the safest option for school, work, and everyday messages—without turning it into a grammar fight.
Fast Meaning And Why It Raises Eyebrows
Conversating is used to mean “talking with someone” or “having a conversation.” In plain terms, it’s the same idea as conversing. The eyebrow part comes from how it entered modern English use and where it tends to show up.
Some readers treat conversate and conversating as informal or nonstandard, even when they understand it. That reaction isn’t about your message being unclear. It’s about expectations: school essays and office memos follow one set of habits, and casual talk follows another.
If you’re writing for a grade, a job, or a publication, the safer move is usually conversing or talking. If you’re chatting with friends, the choice is mostly about your voice and the people you’re talking to.
| Word Or Phrase | Meaning In Plain English | Best Fit By Setting |
|---|---|---|
| conversating | talking with someone; having a conversation | casual speech, texts, informal posts |
| conversing | talking with someone (more formal tone) | school writing, work writing, formal speech |
| talking | speaking with someone | works almost anywhere |
| having a conversation | talking back and forth with someone | neutral, clear, fits most writing |
| chatting | talking in a relaxed way | friendly tone, casual writing |
| speaking with | talking to someone (often purposeful) | work notes, formal emails |
| discussing | talking about a topic in a focused way | school writing, meetings |
| catching up | talking to share updates | friends, family, informal tone |
What Does Conversating Mean?
In everyday use, conversating means “talking with someone” or “having a conversation.” People use it as a verb phrase the same way they use conversing:
- “I was conversating with my cousin on the phone.”
- “They were conversating in the hallway after class.”
- “We were conversating about plans for the weekend.”
If that’s all you needed, you can stop here. Still, the next question is the one that decides what you should type in an essay, email, or application: will a reader judge it?
Why Some People Call It “Nonstandard”
Many readers expect the verb converse (or its -ing form conversing) and don’t expect conversate. When they see conversating, they may label it informal, even when the meaning is clear.
This isn’t rare in English. People form new verbs from related nouns all the time. Still, acceptance varies. One group hears it as normal speech; another group hears it as a “made-up” verb. Both reactions can exist at once, which is why setting matters more than the dictionary definition alone.
Where It’s Common In Real Life
You’ll hear conversating most often in casual speech and casual writing: texts, social media captions, voice notes, or quick replies. Those spaces reward speed, tone, and personality.
In school and work writing, readers tend to expect words that blend in and don’t call attention to themselves. That’s why talking often wins: it’s plain, direct, and it doesn’t start a side debate in the reader’s head.
Conversating Meaning In A Dictionary Sense
Dictionaries record the verb conversate as meaning “to converse.” Merriam-Webster lists it in its dictionary entry for conversate, while also noting that it draws complaints from many readers.
Many English verbs come in pairs that feel similar: educate and education, donate and donation. In that pattern, it’s easy to assume conversate is the verb for conversation. Merriam-Webster explains that this kind of word-building is a back-formation in its article Is ‘Conversate’ a Real Word?
So, yes: you can point to a dictionary and say it’s a word. Still, “is it a word?” isn’t always the same as “is it the best choice for this sentence?” That second question is the one that helps you write with less friction.
Conversing Vs Conversating In Writing
If you’re writing for school, a scholarship, a job, a client, or a public page, choose the option that draws the fewest side reactions. In many settings, that’s conversing or talking.
When “Conversing” Fits Better
Conversing often carries a slightly formal tone. It’s the word you’d expect in a book, a report, or a note from a teacher. It can also sound a bit stiff in a casual message, so use it when that tone matches.
- “The students were conversing quietly before the lecture began.”
- “I was conversing with the registrar about my transcript.”
- “They conversed in Spanish during the meeting.”
When “Talking” Beats Both Options
If you want zero drama, talking is hard to beat. It’s clear, it’s common, and it fits formal and informal writing depending on the sentence around it. In many cases, it also sounds more natural than conversing.
- “We were talking about the homework after class.”
- “I’m talking with my advisor next week.”
- “They were talking on the phone when the train arrived.”
When “Conversating” Feels Right
Conversating can feel right when the voice is casual and personal, and when the audience won’t punish the choice. If the sentence is meant to sound like your real voice, and you’re writing to people who share that voice, it can work.
- “We were conversating for a while, then we lost track of time.”
- “I was conversating with my friend and forgot to reply.”
- “They were conversating outside the café like they owned the sidewalk.”
The risk is not misunderstanding. The risk is judgment from a reader who expects a different form. When the stakes are a grade or a first impression, that’s a trade you don’t need.
How To Decide In Ten Seconds
When you pause and wonder about the word, you don’t need a long rulebook. You need a fast decision that matches your goal.
Step 1: Name The Setting
Ask yourself where this sentence is going:
- School writing (essay, discussion post, email to a teacher)
- Work writing (email, Slack, memo, client message)
- Personal writing (text, DM, caption, private note)
- Public writing (blog post, newsletter, forum reply)
Step 2: Pick The Lowest-Noise Option
If the setting has rules or expectations, pick the word that won’t pull attention away from your point.
- School or work: talking, speaking with, or conversing
- Personal: any option that fits your voice
- Public: pick based on your audience; default to talking or conversing
Step 3: Read It Out Loud
Out loud is a cheat code. If the sentence sounds like a natural line you’d say, it’s probably fine for casual writing. If it sounds like you’re trying to sound formal, go with conversing or rewrite with talking.
When you catch yourself typing the phrase what does conversating mean? while revising, run this quick check and move on. Spending twenty minutes on one word is a rough deal.
Common Mistakes And Cleaner Rewrites
Most problems with conversating aren’t grammar problems. They’re tone problems. The sentence ends up sounding like it’s reaching for a “fancy” word, then the reader trips on it.
| Original Line | Safer Rewrite | Why It Reads Better |
|---|---|---|
| I was conversating with my professor about the exam. | I was talking with my professor about the exam. | Fits school tone; no side reaction. |
| We were conversating regarding the project timeline. | We were talking about the project timeline. | Plain phrasing matches work writing. |
| They conversated in the meeting for an hour. | They talked in the meeting for an hour. | Smoother rhythm; fewer raised eyebrows. |
| I enjoy conversating with new classmates. | I enjoy talking with new classmates. | Friendly tone without sounding stiff. |
| We were conversating and sharing ideas. | We were talking and sharing ideas. | Keeps the sentence light and clear. |
| She was conversating on the phone late. | She was talking on the phone late. | Common phrasing that reads clean. |
If you like the sound of conversing but it feels stiff, pair it with a plain sentence around it. That balance keeps the tone steady.
Quick Practice So It Sticks
Knowing the label is one thing; using it smoothly is another. Here’s a two-minute drill. Read each line aloud. If it sounds like school or work writing, pick conversing or talking. If it sounds like a casual line you’d say to a friend, conversating can fit.
- We were conversing after class about the assignment.
- We were talking after class about the assignment.
- We were conversating after class about the assignment.
- They conversed on the phone for an hour.
- They were conversating on the phone for an hour.
- They were talking on the phone for an hour.
Now do one more step: rewrite one sentence from a real message you sent this week. Swap in conversing, talking, and conversating. Keep the version that sounds like you and fits the setting. That tiny habit turns this word from a debate into a choice you control.
One Last Clarifier
If you’re stuck between being accurate and being accepted, choose acceptance. Your goal is to communicate without distractions. In casual speech, conversating means talking with someone. In school and work writing, conversing or talking keeps the reader on your message in most classrooms and office emails.
And if you’re still thinking what does conversating mean? after reading this, the simplest answer stays the same: it means having a conversation, just in a form that some readers label informal.